tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114351857672166669.post7992871870452729015..comments2023-10-22T11:58:57.101-05:00Comments on because mayonnaise is gross.: A promise to myselfscott.http://www.blogger.com/profile/01730897655064418695noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114351857672166669.post-69085927095241130432009-04-24T00:33:00.000-05:002009-04-24T00:33:00.000-05:00This post does not make me want to swear. Especia...This post does not make me want to swear. Especially the parts about music, travel, and dissent.<br /><br />Also, Ro, you are a wild child.The Last Unicornhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12644605826769289174noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114351857672166669.post-25575120882994292502009-04-23T14:20:00.000-05:002009-04-23T14:20:00.000-05:00I think there should be a food where the chef feed...I think there should be a food where the chef feeds a mother bird specific materials and harvests her regurgitant as some sort of topping or pudding. In order to do this, a company captures the mother and keeps the chicks imprisoned in a box that diverts the food from them into a separate container while simultaneously feeding them a substitute gruel. Later, when the mother dies and the fat, malnourished chicks are ready to replace her, they force the males to breed with the females of a different nest, then kill them and serve them as a separate delicacy. The remaining females are left to repeat the same process as their mothers, entering a new breed into the same exploitative process again and again. <br />The regurgitant will be marketed as a nutritious and highly organic breakfast food or topping, like others of its kind, e.g. milk or honey. Product differentiation can be achieved by feeding the mothers different materials to achieve different tastes.<br /><br />One day aliens will catch on to this venture and, realizing that human vomit is much more palatable to their systems, begin a campaign to kidnap us. They will do so without realizing that humans don't follow the same process as birds, and will resort to a different method of force feeding us and then using a robotic prod to activate our gag reflexes when the ratio of digested food to undigested food is optimal. At first, they will use a chemical coating on the robotic prods and through injections in order to prevent deterioration of the esophagus. Later, when the alien consumer populace complains that the food contains unnatural elements that affect the taste, they will resort to simple machines that kick us in the balls at a scheduled time that matches up with whenever we were fed last. Deteriorating esophaguses will no longer be an issue as the human population reproduces at a fast enough rate and in such levels of poverty that capturing new subjects will be far more cost-efficient, as well as giving the added benefit of generating different flavors from the different poor communities that the resources are harvested from.nhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13869620354370187096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114351857672166669.post-39126615801627882372009-04-23T00:49:00.000-05:002009-04-23T00:49:00.000-05:00how you gonna save the world with yr head glued to...how you gonna save the world with yr head glued to the bar?P. nolhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11830051114048012054noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7114351857672166669.post-61741329869267592172009-04-22T21:52:00.000-05:002009-04-22T21:52:00.000-05:00Let's merge your goals of friend fueled vigor and ...Let's merge your goals of friend fueled vigor and dissent with mine of increased adventure and happyfuntimeness.Kristin CatLadyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09301706186235460315noreply@blogger.com