Monday, August 10, 2009

FOR SALE:

Angry boy who wishes to be lazy. All but refuses to look for job. Rejected from blood plasma donation center. Worried about ramifications of counting on said center for extra income. Does not wish to lose all weekends to pizza delivery. "Will apply tomorrow" quickly becomes personal mantra. "Will eat burrito" quickly becomes bi-daily habit. Pending food stamps would come in handy. Possible openings as line cook could provide much needed employment experience. Can seriously make a good burrito. Already tired of the same drinks in the same yard turning everyday into the same day. Frustrated with the vast difference in scale of distances on a map as compared to distances in reality. Will now watch Major League 2 and drink Diet Mountain Dew.

Asking price-One bottle of Andre Extra Dry and a little bit of orange juice, OBO.

3 comments:

  1. when i get back, we need some andre to celebrate our lack of meaning in life.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I've got some coffee flavored gum and a lot of orange juice ... ?

    ReplyDelete
  3. .....coffee flavored gum? no thanks! the deal is off.

    ReplyDelete