so maybe this one's for salinger for illustrating these things better than i can.
after years and years of political arguments with conservative assholes, i'm finding myself picking fights with leftists these days. when people bicker over the ill-informed subtleties of the power of one's dollar or the motivations and complexities behind humans holding a political office, the holes and the flaws within these arguments start shouting out and the self-righteous attitudes begin looking so much uglier. and it's not necessarily the self-righteousness. sometimes it's just the fact that it makes people feel better about themselves for doing things like giving up meat or buying shit from a smaller independent store or trying to ride their bike more or reading a noam chomsky book or turning off the lights when they leave a room. maybe it's the post-capitalist nihilist in me, but i think these forms of self-absorbed philanthropy are on par with spending an hour in front of the mirror before going out for the night or having a kid to fill empty holes in hearts or drinking yourself stupid or showing off new things to people who don't give two shits.
i think i'm just having a hard time finding the beauty in humanity when all i can see is subconscious ulterior motivations and inherent selfishness in every move made.